Wrestling Message Board Heel Finally DQ’d By Babyface Moderator

Wrestling fans on the TopRopeStraightDope.com message board popped hard when notorious heel DMPunk was finally DQ’d by babyface moderator MachoMensch3 last weekend.

“I never thought I’d see the day,” posted wrestling fan JamesHellsworth. “DMPunk’s been trolling our board for so long that I thought nobody would have the stones to take his Rickrolling ass down.”

The mysterious heel, known only as DMPunk, had terrorized TopRopeStraightDope.com for three years, blindsiding posters with his take-no-prisoners posting style.

“Dude would not hesitate to start some beef,” said retired message board member NoPainInThisMojo. “If you posted something positive about John Cena, he would post Photoshops of your mom making out with a pizzacat or Scrappy-Doo before you even had time to blink.”

Initially, DMPunk’s rude-dude attitude made him a big hit on the boards. Audience reaction to the showboating and malicious DMPunk changed when he started heavily praising universally loathed wrestler Roman Reigns.

“We couldn’t tell if he was being ironic or not,” said moderator MachoMensch3. “It was weird, man. Nobody could really be that jazzed about Roman, but he would just go on and on about how mighty and glorious that big wet moose is. It got tired fast.”

The final straw for DMPunk on the board came late Sunday night when he posted one of his signature Momshop Low Blows. In response to EggMcMahon’s criticism of Reigns being the 30th entrant in the Royal Rumble match, DMPunk created a meme depicting EggMcMahon’s mother making out with Roman Reigns in the backseat of a Delorean.

“People were blowing up my inbox, asking me to do something,” MachoMensch3 said. “Pizzacats and Scrappy-Doos are one thing, but Roman Reigns? C’mon, man- that’s somebody’s mom you’re messing with. It was time for me to finally act.”

Electrified fans watched as MachoMensch3 disqualified DMPunk, sending him to the showers with an immediate lifetime ban.

“This is the most satisfying payoff to a feud since D-Bry won the strap at WM 30,” EggMcMahon posted on the board.

As of press time, a new user named RayRomanoReigns had just joined the message board and posted photos of MachoMensch3’s mother in a threeway with Smokey Bear and Dean Ambrose.

Photo by Colyn Emery